Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen reasons why I hate Valentine's Day

1. All those damn commericals for Match.com and EWhoremony. Am I the only one out there that feels online dating is nothing more than legal prostitution?

2. Christmas is over and we have to have yet another holiday that encourages the consumption of chocolate. ARGH! Will someone please hide the raspberry Hershey kisses please?

3. If you're single you feel like a freak on this day.

4. I have to listen to my sister bitch about how diamonds are a horrible gift everytime a Kay Jeweler's commerical or a Diamonds are Forever commerical comes on. Personally if anyone wants to give me a diamond I will not turn it down. My ring size is 6 thank you very much and I prefer white gold.

5. All those horrid sappy love songs that you can't seem to get away from drive me mad. If Celine's heart doesn't stop going on, I think I'm going to go all Van Gogh. Oh and Silly Love Songs is one of McCartney's worst.

6. Too much pink.

7. No one's taking me anywhere to have lambic beer in a champagne glass dipped in chocolate. I cannot stress this enough.

8. All the ads in the newspaper for dinners for two and weekend retreats. Damn it, I want to retreat! I just want to get out of my house!

9. All I hear around this time of year is how there's someone for everyone. PAH! Well if there is, just where in the hell is he? Huh? Huh? I start asking this question back: Where's My Everything? <------ click to download this wonderful song by Nick Lowe.

10. I become more and more obsessed with my looks. (This ultimately makes me a cranky girl at times)

11. I begin to ponder why life is never like those romance novels I read to keep myself from dying of boredom.

12. The word love sends me into fits of rage.

13. My theme song changes from The Beatles Nowhere Man to Oingo Boingo's Skin <---- click to download the most beautiful song ever.