I'm Such A Fool

OK, if I thought he'd come here today...I'd scream at the top of my lungs, "ASK FOR MY PHONE NUMBER, DAMMIT!"

His email hates me...and he checked the blog yesterday...and what he read besides that first post about my parents' anniversary I don't know.

We established this before, but I'm positive it does now.

So, to add to my pain, I don't know if he's getting the emails or not?

Now what's a girl with a huge crush to do? Huh? Huh?

I'm doing my best not to be a pest...My confidence is at a new low. I wish I could just come out and ask him to meet me for coffee or drinks or something somewhere, but considering the email issue I'm too scared, because if I get no reply I wouldn't know if he didn't get the email or if he was just ignoring me. (That and getting a no would probably devastate me at this point) <------- This is what's keeping me from asking when I call in on Fridays. Something I'm not sure I'm going to do today, because fear has taken over.

Every insecurity I have has reared its head.

Am I not pretty enough?

Am I not interesting enough?

GAH!

I want today to be over, and I just want to go hide somewhere.