Infinite Boredom

I think for the better part of the past two years I've been bored. Not that there haven't been moments of great excitement in my life. I've listed many of them in the recent past, so no need to go over them again.

But why am I bored?

Dammit I have no money.

Wretched job situations have plagued me since 2002. Just when I think I might get back on my feet something happens to knock me down. If it weren't for the kindness of family, friends and some almost strangers, I wouldn't be able to do anything. It would be me and the computer against the world. (Sadly that's almost the case now)

I think on top of the no money situation I have a few other things dragging me down. I'm burning out on my writing. I've rambled off about how many stories and such that I've written in the past year or so. In the last month, I've hardly written anything. I don't know if it's lack of inspiration (which I don't believe is the case) or just the fact that I don't think anyone cares anymore.

I like to share what I write with the world, probably one of the main reasons I have a blog, but when I share something and no one tells me what they think of it, well it gets me wondering if it was worth the time I put into it.

The dieting thing has been getting me down too. Everyone knows that. I think my cat even knows it. I think I've gotten the scale down and then...Whoops! Right back up again. It's frustrating and it doesn't seem to matter how much I eat, don't eat, exercise or sit on my butt, the scale does what it pleases.

So not only am I bored but I'm depressed. It doesn't make for a happy human that's for sure. Even my mix cd making has slowed down. I've made 4 this month, but they weren't very inspired, 3 were reasons to love a specific artist, namely the Moody Blues, Elvis Costello and Erasure and the 4th was the 20 Reasons Callie Should Have a Great Birthday Mix. Go ahead, check that one out, I'm proud of the choices I made.

The worst part of my infinite boredom is that I have ideas, for stories, mixes etc...but I can't motivate myself to do them. So what do I do? I stare comatose at the computer.

It could be because this,



is my desktop....what do you think. Oh and someone tell him to stop looking so squirrelly, his face may freeze that way and it depresses me.