Priorities

I've found that my priorities are really muddled these day. I need to try to focus on my one goal. Getting bills paid off.

If the bills don't get paid off I can't justify any trips or anything else for that matter. I'm getting so darn close too. At this time next year, most of it should be gone. Assuming my computers don't die or my car or a myriad of other things.

I'd like to be able to pick up and have a real vacation for once. You know the kind where I get to spend more then 2 or 3 days on the Jersey shore.

My problem is that other than the bills I have nothing that I want badly anymore. I've lost focus on everything while I've sat here grasping at straws for the last 6 months to a year. At one point I thought a trip to Vegas was what I wanted, or a trip to Maine, but I don't want to do it alone and I have no one that I want to spend several days with.

Yes, I don't even know what I want anymore. Though I'm fast learning that what I want is more than just material things, its also more than happiness and love, if that even exists. Perhaps what I'm searching for is simply contentment.