Why The Gym Amuses Me

~ Only the men carry on conversations while working out. In fact, I think Jack's Total Fitness is a special "guy hangout place." Sometimes I feel like an interloper being there, not that there aren't a dozen skinny wenches there to make me feel like a heifer.

~ Gym Hottie is vain. I could sing the Carly Simon tune to him, that's how vain he is. He spends more time in front of the mirror looking for whatever than any women. I've been tempted to come up behind him and just tell him he's gorgeous...he can stop looking. If he ever turns not gorgeous, I'll be the first to inform him. (Gym Hottie looks suspiciously like another person that I lust after)

~ The elliptical machines refuse to get together and determine how many calories I'm burning. On one machine it claims I burn 100 calories in about 8 minutes and on another it says I burn 100 in about 11 minutes. WTF is up with that.

~ The thigh shrinking machine seems to not want to shrink my thighs.

~ The ab machines work and though the scale hates me, I have a pretty damn flat belly. Woot for me!

~ For some reason the people that control the music at the club seem to think we all like to work out to heavy metal. It's at times like this that I hate being from Pittsburgh. Hair bands annoy the hell out me. Though the other day they played a song by the band Vixen which I liked. I wish I could remember which one it was now.