And When I Win the Lottery or the Money Fairy Visits

OK, so the first part of that won't happen, because I don't play the lottery. For me it's a waste of money, the only luck I have is bad, so I'd never even win the token 5 dollars.

But if I did once all the bills were paid, I'd travel to all the places I've always wanted to go. See in my 29 years I've never really been much of anywhere. I was in Toronto for a few hours back in 92. My family vacations always consisted of trips to Erie, where my brother lived at that time, sometimes to Sea World in Aurora OH and very often to Lancaster, PA.

Funny thing is, if I had the money right now, that would be where I'd go first. I'd probably go there for a week and do all the things I love doing there. Eating at the family style restaurants, like Good N' Plenty and Plain and Fancy, shopping at the farm markets and the outlets. And lastly I'd go to Longwood Gardens. Longwood Gardens is the most beautiful place in Pennsylvania. If you're ever in the Philadelphia area, try to get to Kennett Square to see this place. It's just a beautiful experience and if you love flowers it's not to be missed.

~sigh~

I won't be going there anytime soon. I wonder if I'll ever go anywhere again. I mean besides Atlantic City. I'm going to have to drive past these places in a few weeks. I'll probably cry.

See my last vacation was about 11 years ago. When there was some money, there were other things that kept me from going, and now, well there isn't any money and its not looking like there ever will be.

So my guess is I've put a lot of my life in things rather than places. At least I still have things. When you go to places, you have memories, but I often wonder if memories are worth it. They are only one step above a fantasy and they only reside in your mind and maybe on film. So if I have choice between the tangible and the intangible, I'm going with the tangible.

I'm strange like that. I want clothes and pretty things. I want stuff. I always have. Stuff amuses me. The more stuff I have, the better.

I guess that's why the farthest I've been from home could see me back home in 24 hours.

Now I'd start doing what I want, if I could. Only I wouldn't know where to start, besides the usual. I'd spent more than a night in Atlantic City. I'd go to Cedar Point. Spend weeks lazy by Lake Erie, then on to Niagra Falls. If I felt more inclined to drift far away, I'd go to Vegas. I'd drive there too, because frankly the thought of airplanes leaves me feeling nauseous.

I'd see all the shows I want to see. If I ever did get the urge to fly, I'd go to England. (my fantasy that will remain a fantasy until I die, I imagine) I'd see Michael Ball in concert.

Not the Moody Blues, they come to places in the US enough that I'd want to see someone different, and Michael Ball is one of my favorite performers from musical theater. He has the most beautiful voice. He was one of the 3 versions of the song A Winter's Tale that I found this Christmas. ~sigh~ I love that song so very much, whether it's Justin or Michael or David singing it.

I think the only place I'm going today is in my mind...so without further ado, this lonely dreamer is off.