More Adventures In Online Dating

 OK, firstly would love to get to a date.

Would love for one of these guys to hit dial on the phone instead of endless texts.

I realize speaking to a person requires effort and that's something most really do not want to put forth.

Granted there is one guy that I could probably text to forever because he's fun and has an illusion of adorableness I don't want to let go of.

But back to this one guy..we matched on 2 sites.

He's cute...he's younger..

And then starts the dirty talk.

Only not done well.

A little lesson guys.

If you are going to venture into the arena of dirty texting, which isn't quite sexting...do it well.

Because if you don't do it well..you end up like Dial A Dick...a'la Mrs. Brown's Boys. OK, at least Agnes got her Dial A Dick...

But again it helps to make your texting erm....stimulating.

Imagery guys.

Not vulgarity.

Don't write me a porno either. If I want that..I could find it on my own.

Oh and keep your willy to yourself, m'kay?

Online Dating Randomosity Part 2

 So in the middle of the night I heard my phone chime.

WTF

I think I managed to give the brush off to the one boy that kept tossing around the words nice and sexy. Please guys, if you want to talk dirty, talk dirty, don't say nice and sexy, cos it simply isn't? M'kay?

Someone matched with me.

Being 3 a.m and yeah I must be lonely as the Matchbox Twenty song goes...but still trying to sleep...I turned over.

Fast forward to 8 a.m ish and I decide to just say hello to the guy. Cos, why not?

OMG...I got his life story and how he wants to find the love of his life etc...etc..etc..

Uh ok, that's not how you start out talking to a girl/woman/potential date.

Firstly, I'm not on these sites looking for a husband.

I don't want one.

I'm 46....

I want someone to talk too...be friends with...other things...ya know...but marriage is not really on my mind. I mean if it happens that's wonderful, but its not really what I'm looking for.

Why?

Cos most men in my age range are divorced with crotch goblins, and I am so not good with children and I don't want to screw up someone else's kids. I'm responsible like that.

Don't tell me that you hope I'm your soul mate within 3 sentences. PLEASE.

God, oh can any guy shave these days?

Why I Think I Just Won't Swipe At All

 I've been mostly absent lately because I've been making an attempt in this pandemic to have a social life.

HAHAHA

I have made contact with several boys of varying ages....36 to 49.

I use the term boys because they all act that way. None like grown men.

49 year old we will call K..cos it suits him. 

Talked to him. 

Texted on a daily basis...

When it came to meeting up...he vanished, never to be heard from again. 

My guess...wife came back..

Next up...M a thirty something.

Was super flattering.

Like too flattering.

Questions asked weren't normal

I was hit by a dating bot?

WTF.

3rd one. P..Im still getting texts from this one.

If he carried on a normal conversation..well it would be nice

So far nice and sexy are in his vocabulary.

ARGH!

4th one...J.

Another thirty something.

Of the 4....I really really liked this one because well...he wasn't overly flirty or flattery..

We just kinda of randomly messaged...and from the start he wanted to meet for coffee and seemed ok with the age difference.  He was quirky and he seemed like even if we didn't hit it off on a romantic scale...we might be friends. 

AGAIN...we had normal texts, but as soon as it got close to meeting.

Guess what? He vanished. And like all BOYS wasn't going to tell me anything until the last minute.

Seriously guys! This is not how you hook up with anyone....try to date them or whatever. I realize I have been out of the dating game for a long time, but RESPECT, learn it.  Its not hard.

One other thing.

Try a little honesty. M'kay. It goes a long way.

Silver Fox Friday

 I was going through some of my old blog posts here..and I got around to reading the documentation of the last horrific crush I had.

A certain "Fish" that was a DJ on a local oldies station. 

He probably qualifies as a silver fox now...but I don't think he deserves that title, cos ultimately he ended up being a jerk. I never do anything halfway though...if I like you...I like you with ever fiber of my being. So learning he was a jerk hurt something awful.

That said, I'm really not sure how I developed the crush I have on my Endodontist. Look at me saying it like I've seen him for more than an hour. Sigh...Dr. Jeff Michau the McDreamiest of all McDreamy dentists.

~sigh

THUD

DROOLS

I plucked this one from the instagram site of their dental group. I still offer my services. No not those kinds of services...well maybe, as long as  the wife wouldn't mind. I really would give him back. Gently used..cos he sure has a pretty everything and I wouldn't mind using him for a bit....maybe longer than a bit.

But really these guys need some more pictures of them. I mean come on...Just let me take a few. Also I wouldn't mind spending more than 45 minutes with him..without a rubber dam in my mouth or a drill coming at me, while wearing those super cool glasses. (My sarcasm knows no bounds today)

Seriously from my root canal experience. I can only remember a pair of the prettiest blue eyes I've ever seen in my entire life, and I've been on the plant a year longer than he has. I remember his laugh...And I remember him calling my two root canals beautiful. (Grumble grumble grumble)

I will however dream that those two times he muttered beautiful while drilling a hole to China in my mouth that he was talking about my big terrified brown eyes or me in general. A girl has to have her dreams, m'kay.

But back to my offer of being their resident photographer. (Heck I'd probably do it for free, or at least coffee and conversation with these guys) Come on boys..I'm a fun person, even if I am a trifle crazy, but its a good kind of crazy...the kind of crazy that supplies coffee, cookies and smacks you upside the head when you take yourself too seriously.

I'll even take pictures of Kent and Spencer. Cos well they have the pretty going on too.

Sigh..I'll take one of each or 3 of the one on the right 

Progress

 The carpet is now off my stairs

My tile is down in my bathroom

Things are slowly starting to take shape. Woo hoo.

I can't wait til my house is in habitable again.

A Whole Day Off

 I went to Ohiopyle today.

It never got out of the teens in the mountains.

Fekking cold is what I'd call it, but the Yough looked beautiful because it was sunny and glorious.

A wonderful day all around..

Some highlights

The Scenic Overlook on Route 40 heading up the huge ass mountain, just before the Summit Inn

The Cucumber Falls and the lovely frozenness 

The main falls area and the Yough just past the falls heading down towards the Cucumber Falls

Views from the GAP Trail

The Baughman Overlook. Needless to say I didn't stand at that railing but at a point to the right because I could walk up in the snow, thus not killing myself today! YAY!

Mill Run Windfarm aka, Andrea is obsessed with windmills as much as she is with Jeff Minchau. LOL You thought I'd post something without mentioning him! Ha!

You can actually see 2 of the other Somerset County windfarms from this one. The view here is spectacular!

Next up, East Park Falls in Connellsville, PA

Silver Fox Friday

 OK,  most week's I would highlight some sexy silver fox besides, Dr. Jeff Minchau.

But seriously I have had about the worst week ever, most of which deals with my bathroom remodel.

I will be up on a cold mountaintop on Saturday, as long as it doesn't snow, screaming at the top of my lungs and taking pretty pictures of the Cucumber Falls and the main falls at Ohiopyle.

This is a cathartic thing as I know Ohiopyle was one of my mom's favorite places to visit. I also plan to walk the GAP trail a little bit as well, cos I haven't in years and years and I could stand a long long walk.

So because of all the upheaval and stress in my life, I'm devoting this week's Silver Fox Friday to the only Silver Fox that matters.

Yes. Dr. Jeff Minchau...you are again the sexiest silver fox in the tri-state area. (PA, WV & MD heck maybe even OH too)

See I've got very discerning taste. Which is why I find all three of the Endos at MMS Endodontic Specialists so darn tasty.

I mean really look at these guys?

The lineup is Kent McBridge (who is quite the studly muffin too) Spencer Stiles (cute yet geeky) and at the end...Absolute Perfection....Jeff Minchau.

Seriously, why is there not 2 of him? Couldn't someone clone Jeff for me? Or if maybe his wife would just loan him out to me for a day or so. 

I promise I would return him in mostly good condition...maybe a little tired, but I would return him.

And since I'm in need of prettiness this week..cos everything sucks..this picture of the guys total adorableness

Look! Now they are in opposite order and Jeff is all awkward cos someone stole his undershirt.

(So glad, Dr. Minchau doesn't google himself, or I would be in so much trouble...OK, he'd have to figure out which patient I was...but I'm sure it wouldn't be too hard)

So If you don't mind, I'm going to drool on these three lovelies.

I Finally Finished It

 I have not finished reading a book since my root canal work 2 months ago. Between the stress of my teeth and the stress of my life I just couldn't do it.

The book I just finished was started pre root canal. So that was before 11/20. I have never ever taken that long to finish reading anything. Even Gone With The Wind was finished in about a week or so.

Now I have to struggle to review the book.

I really thought 2020 was going to be the year of the book with me. Instead it was the year of the tooth. It started out with my dog's tooth and worked its way up to me...with some huge dental explosions.

It is my goal to read more in this year, but I am not setting any numerical goal. I want to read because I want to, not because I feel pressured into doing.

Silver Fox Friday

 Another Friday some more Silver Foxes.

First up is my buddy Bilbo who has so kindly volunteered to be one of my real life silver foxes.

He is a super nice guy, who you can talk to about politics over a good cup of Joe and you won't want to beat him up and also a dancer extraordinaire.

Next up our Celebrity Silver Fox Hugh Grant. I think I have a thing for British guys? I'll just ignore what he does with American hookers. LOL

OK, now for what we've all been waiting for...this week's sexy endodontist....You have no idea how hard it is to find pictures of McDreamy...aka Dr. Meow...aka....Dr. Jeffrey Minchau....Oh Jeffrey!!!!

So he's part of a group called Meridian Dental Specialist. He's important...title Chief Clinical Officer. That means he has a brain..and is smarter that most of us.

~sigh~

Gorgeous and smart...oh and really....he's disgustingly nice...I mean that in a good way...cos you really don't want a nasty dentist right? Sadistic yes...nasty no.. And ALL DENTISTS ARE SADISTIC. You can't want to go into that line of work without that nature..And don't get me started on people that want to be OB-GYN's....cos what kind of sicko are you if you want to look at those all day!

But moving right along....before I got sidetracked by a vagina monologue...my silver fox. He's having a bit of a fashion emergency and I want to help out. See he is deeply attached to undershirts and they are throwing off the look of that lovely Ralph Lauren Polo Shirt.

I could forgive him for that transgression if there wasn't another photo on the page taken on the same day.

Yes, sweetie, share that Mimosa. That is a Mimosa, right? But erm the trousers...the hand in the pocket tugging on said trousers and the poor fit of your rather pricey garments makes this girl want to cry.

Cos I know he can do better. I've seen the reindeer sweater...Like this whole outfit should be sent to goodwill. Cos it makes him look...well...old and oh I don't even want to say it, but I will, chubby? But that's ok..we all have bad days..I've had a few bad years..but there is one thing that there is NO EXCUSE FOR and that's ill fitting garments. I don't care who you are, what your income level is, you must buy clothes that fit.

I worked retail. I was a selling specialist. I appreciate a sharp dressed man.  99% of the time. Dr. Minchau falls under the label of "perfect" I mean he makes scrubs look good! WTF. Who does that?

Why did your wife let you out of the house that day? Because really if you were doing something important I would have been supervising the wardrobe. And for me, photos for websites constitute as important. Cos people are going to look at them on a regular basis.

But that's ok...just remember that whole outfit goes to the bin. Forget you ever owned it, and never ever put it on again.