Stay In Bed Kinda Day

Its cold, its rainy and I'm just not in any mood to be part of the world today. I don't want to leave the warmth of my bed. I did though, but I really want to go back to bed and stay there for the rest of the day.

Nope I have no motivation today. None whatsoever.

Now if you don't mind, I think I have a date with my blanket and my pillow, not that I'll be able to sleep. I just want to be warm, which is nowhere outside of my bed right now.

Brrr.

If I find my motivation it will be a miracle. If I hadn't given up caffeine a month ago I'd say I needed a huge cup of coffee, but I'm trying to avoid stuff like that.

Maybe I should break out the DVDs and watch some movies or tv, at least I'd feel like I did something.

Christmas Shopping

I'm scared of doing holiday shopping this year. The economy scares me and I have just enough usually to make all my bills. I don't want to dig myself in deep and not be able to get out, especially as I have a health insurance premium to pay now.

That doesn't mean I'm not going to spend, that just means I have to be very careful this year. I want to have my last bills paid off in the next 10 months if possible.

I don't trust that my job will be around. I never have and I don't want to have a bazillion worries if something were to go awry in the next few months.

Yes, I'm a perpetual worrier, but I've had so many years of things going wrong that I don't want to take any chances anymore.

I want a good holiday but I don't want to be taken to the poor house because of it.

Wait, I'm already in the poor house.

I just don't want to be a nervous wreck over debt ever again. I was that way once, and I've vowed not to let it happen.

Top 5 On Friday - Week 201

From Music Memoirs


Top 5 musical things on your Christmas Wish List.

1. Any CD from my Amazon Wish List

2. A new mp3 player with more storage space! Or even a smaller one that will hold special favorites.

3. A small CD Player for my bedroom. My unit I bought a few years back for about $35 bucks bit the dust, or at least the part that opens to allow you to put the CD in broke.

4. A Dell Desk Top with a 500 GB Hard Drive to hold all my music. (This is my dream gift)

5. A large storage cabinet for my CDs. I need loads of room!

Happy Thanksgiving

A blessed a safe holiday to all my friends. May your day be filled with all the good things that life has to offer; family, friends and good eats.

Remember...Count your blessings instead of sheep.

Missing You

This is going to be the first Thanksgiving/Holiday Season without grandma. Its been exactly 7 months since her passing and I can't talk about her with getting teary eyed.

Her house is mine, in name, but I can't think of it as such. In fact, I wish the market were better so that I could sell it, only its across the street from my home, so I'll probably be upset when new people take over, because that house will always be GRANDMA'S! Its a Catch 22.

The next month or so going to be hard for us. That empty seat at the dinner table tomorrow will be the reminder that one that was so important to us is no longer here.

I can only hold fast to my belief that she's with god and that somehow she'll be with us throughout the day in spirit.

But then I think. If this was my first year with god, and the first year that I've seen my family that have all long since passed, why would I want to check in on those that we left in this world?

Oh yes, I remember...She loves us more.

I love you more Grandma.

Those words were almost a joke when you said them, but we know you meant them and I miss hearing them.

Its going to be a rough few days here, but I know we'll get through them. I only hope I can keep the tears to a minimum.

Tuesday Tunes: Week 59

From Music Memoirs


What musical things are you the most thankful for?
I'm going to list a few that always make my life happy.

1. Concerts like Rockapella, Gordon Lightfoot, Nick Lowe and Peter Noone.
2. Christmas music, especially when the artist has written new material.
3. My favorite recording artists, who make my days a little brighter with their songs.
4. New musical discoveries like Judd Starr, Chris Blake and Deni Bonet, whose music has made my year much happier.

If you could say thanks to one artist/band who would it be and why?
This year I would thank Nick Lowe for the show that took some pain out of the weekend of April 26th. For a few fleeting hours that Sunday night I stopped crying and enjoyed the music. I would also have to thank Ron Sexsmith too, since he was the opening act and I enjoyed his performance as well.

Another Monday Morning

Its the start of another same old same old. Talk of the need for a bigger stimulus package to kick start our faltering economy. All the not so new politicians that are going to be part of Obama's cabinet. Uh, yeah, change is coming to Washington. I guess its going to be in the form of ideas, which Obama does seem to have. Here's hoping everyone can create something from them.

Oh a mini-highlight as I fell asleep through the last half of Colbert's Christmas episode. Damn and blast. Which means I slept through Elvis Costello singing.

I hate my sleep schedule, have I mentioned that lately. I'm up at 5 or earlier and I'm dead to the world by 9:30 or 10.

Blech!

So, aside from this being a short week, it looks to be full of much the same as usual.

~sigh~

I really need to take my life back, only I don't know how. This downward spiral I seem to be on scares me. Its hard to explain how weird I've felt in the last few months. I'm a compulsive worrier, yes, but things have escalated to epic proportions with me to the point that I know I'm going to have to take some kind of action soon.

Blech.

The thought of dealing with a doctor for the stupid stuff that I've been worrying about just makes me feel like a fool, and maybe I am.

That's not to say I'm depressed all the time or worrying all the time. I have enjoyed things lately. (Shrimp and Rockapella...odd combo isn't that) Its just something has taken over my life and I don't like it and I feel powerless to do anything about it.

Nightmares

OK, this is starting to be a Saturday night thing with bad sleep and I'm not liking it one iota. I was sleeping good too, all curled up and warm with all 3 kittens at the small of my back.

So what happens?

Nightmare!

Yeah I dreamed mom and I were arguing about a frozen pizza that we had made. My nephew had come into the kitchen and someone had walked on our porch so he locked the door.

The next thing I know I see a light on in grandma's house in her bedroom and I'm trying to call 911 only I have no voice.

That's when I woke up.

Thank god.

I didn't want to have a sleep panic attack.

So it's 6 a.m. and I'm sitting here blogging because I don't want to go back to sleep.

ARGH!

Brrrr

It's 7 a.m. on a Saturday, why am I awake? I think it has to do with being cold and just not wanting to sleep with 3 kittens on my body. At least they were warm. Actually I was too until the mama cat started talking to me.

Once I was awake the cold sunk in.

Damn.

Now I'm up and too cold to do anything else.

Way to whine much?

The kittens, however are full of all kinds of energy. Lucky them!

If only I could go back to bed, I'd be in good shape. Maybe I'd get warm again. But I can't do that, there is stuff to do today and I need to be productive, even though I'd rather not be.

Top 5 On Friday - Week 200

From Music Memoirs


Top 5 reasons you splurge on a purchase of music

1. Its an artist I absolutely love and have to have every recording by, like Elvis Costello, The Moody Blues, Duran Duran and Erasure.

2. I need to have something to make me feel happy, and buying a CD is cheaper than buying clothes.

3. I've found something that I can't purchase just anywhere and I have to have it!!! I just won an auction on ebay for one of the Rockapella imports! $9.50!!! Woot!

4. It's a great price!! I can't resist a good deal!

5. (This is my favorite answer) I just want too!

My Review Is Posted

I was finally coherent enough to write my review of the Rockapella show. It's posted on a Livejournal community that I write for. If you'd like to check it out the review, just go here.

I'm really happy I went to that show. It was great fun!

Randomosity

~ Elvis Costello is going to be on Cobert's Christmas Special! Woot! I can't wait to see that!

~ Next week I get a mental health day for Black Friday. No I'm not going shopping, its a mental health day, and one I sorely need.

~ Reading about anti-anxiety meds scared the hell out of me. How do you rid yourself of anxiety/panic attacks without them?

~ I'm one of the only people that just doesn't give a rat's butt about the Twilight movie. I can't get into those kinda books. I was like that with Harry Potter too, though I have read a few of the books. They just don't make me get excited.

~ Most of Rockapella's CDs are out-of-print or can only be bought on their website for semi-reasonable prices new, where the shipping is downright insane!!! ARGH! I need Smilin!



And don't get me started on how much those Japanese import CDs cost on Amazon!

~ I've had a shrimp craving for the last month that won't go away. Scampi, broiled, fried; GIVE ME ALL THE SHRIMP!!!!!

~ Today is my older sister's b-day. I've promised her dinner at River House in town when her youngest son isn't making her cook for his brood of friends/going to his girlfriends/working.

The Concert Bit My Butt

I am so tired today, I don't know how I'm going to keep my eyes open until 4 o'clock. I actually yawned my way through the first part of the show last night, which was terribly embarrassing.

I'm so glad I went to the concert though, it was great fun and Rockapella really can sing. I highly recommend them to anyone that has the chance to see them. Pick up a CD too. You won't be sorry. I've only a few of their 11 discs, because most are Japanese imports that are way to pricey to buy (Hints for anyone wanting to buy me a Christmas present) for myself.

Most of the discs you'll buy won't have the current lineup, but that's not to be worried about, the previous members are just as good as the 4 guys singing now, though I can't help but wish a new album would be forthcoming.

What I don't recommend anymore are concerts one work nights when the following day can't be taken off. I'm really going to fall asleep on my desk today and that's not a good thing at all.

Rockapella!

OMG Awesome is about all I can say. This was a quality show for $30. And we were about 5 rows back from the stage. (Actual 3rd row of seats in the theater though)

No Flash photography was allowed but, let me tell you, my camera did well without the flash, since we were that close.

Most of my photos can be found here.

A full review of the show will be posted on my music community on LJ in the coming days. I promise to post a link when its ready. Right now I'm just too darn tired to do much of anything, besides share my pictures.

This was the first show in a long time where my brain said, you love the guys, but you can't stay for a signing. I feel bad about that, but I know that my body would hate me this morning, if I had. It already does.

Enjoy the pictures, and if you ever want to hear a great acapella singing group, see Rockapella if they come to your town. You won't regret it.

Tuesday Tunes: Week 58

From Music Memoirs


If money were no object, what band would you see in concert? I'd have to say Erasure, because they are one of the only bands that I absolutely love but have never had the opportunity to see. Close behind them would be Over The Rhine, Hem, and Keri Noble.

Where were the closest seats you've ever had for a show (that was non-general admission)?
I think tonight's Rockapella show is the closest I've ever been. We're only about 3 or 5 rows back from the stage! I hope they allow cameras!

What type of venue do you prefer to see a show?
Small venues are the best, either a small theater or club. Casino theaters also rank high with me. I hate the big amphitheaters, which is why I seldom see big named artists. Smaller venues are friendlier too in my book, unless they are in Pittsburgh, where almost all the venues are crap.

I Failed to Mention

One of the kittens left to go to her new home on Saturday. It was hard letting her go, as I love all 4 babies, but one can't have a house full of cats no matter how much you'd like to.

Yes, I'm a crazy cat lady. Which is why all the kittens and mama cat will be fixed by spring. I couldn't take having another litter of kittens. I get too attached. These little ones were like my children.

Coco is the black and brownish kitteh. The other one is her brother Skimble Shanks, named after the Railway Cat in T. S. Eliot's Book Of Practical Cats and of course the musical that came from it.

I miss her already.

My Sleep Schedule Is A Mess

Here I am, awake again, long before 7. I've been up since 5:30 and I didn't get into bed until almost 1:30. Thankfully I had slept a few hours before coming up to bed. Its amazing what TV I will fall asleep through, even if its stuff that usually watch!

I'm getting annoyed by not being able to sleep normally. Our couch is far from comfortable. My back can attest to that, but for some reason, I lay down there, and boom! I'm out like a light.

That's not at all how I used to be.

I think stress and my wonderful penchant for worrying has totally got my body in a fucked up tizzy. I have anxiety over dealing with my gram's estate and those damn eye floaters that I've bugged so many of you about. Then I had that issue with my boob. Not fun. But all of it kinda got muddled together.

My stomach is not happy.

My sleep schedule is out of whack.

I just want to feel like myself again and right now I'm not even sure if I can remember how that feels.

Health Insurance, I Have It!

Yesterday my medical card from Highmark came in the mail. Words cannot express how much joy I felt upon opening the envelope and finding it nestled inside.

I can only afford a high deductible plan right now, but my coverage allows for routine exams with the insurance paying 90% without worrying about my deductible.

Yay!

That makes me feel a certain amount of relief.

So as of December 1st I'll be covered.

Everyone breathe a sigh of relief with me!

Top 5 On Friday - Week 199

From Music Memoirs


Top 5 songs that make you feel smarter for having heard them. (Interpret as you see fit)

1. They Might Be Giants - Why Does The Sun Shine (The Sun Is A Mass Of Incandescent Gas)




2. Gordon Lightfoot - The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald
I never would have known anything about that ship if it hadn't been for this song.

3. George Harrison - Bangladesh
George was one of the pioneers of the benefit concert and his song Bangladesh got it going.



4. The Byrds - Turn Turn Turn

The lyrics are taken almost verbatim from the King James version of the Bible (Ecclesiastes 3, verses 1–8).

5. They Might Be Giants - Istanbul (Not Constantinople)

Come on! They even used it in a cartoon!!!

Congrats To Lady Antebellum

I watched the CMA Awards last night. I actually enjoyed it. I guess I'm slowly becoming a fan of country music. I loved Brad Paisley as one of the co-hosts.

The performances were all pretty darn good, but I have to say Lady A was my favorite. Perhaps I'm partial because I've seen them live and I think Charles Kelly is just the cutest thing.

Here's a list of all the winners, and oddly I agreed and called several of them earlier in the day. I'm also thrilled that Sugarland won, as they are my second favorite country band right now.

• Entertainer of the Year: Kenny Chesney
• Female Vocalist: Carrie Underwood
• Male Vocalist: Brad Paisley
• New Artist: Lady Antebellum
• Vocal Group: Rascal Flatts
• Vocal Duo: Sugarland
• Single of the Year: "I Saw God Today," George Strait
• Album of the Year: Troubador, George Strait
• Song of the Year: "Stay," Jennifer Nettles
• Musical Event: Robert Plant and Alison Krauss, "Gone, Gone, Gone"
• Music Video: Brad Paisley, "Waitin' on a Woman"
• Musician: Mac McAnally, guitar

I've Been Tagged

By Utopia

The Rules:
1. Link to the person who tagged you.
2. Post the rules on the blog.
3. Write six random things about yourself.
4. Tag six people at the end of your post.
5. Let each person know they have been tagged.
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

1. In the past month I've given up caffeine and all I've been drinking is herbal tea, caffeine free soda and decaf coffee, and very little of the decaf coffee.

2. For years I watched very little tv, this season I now have about 8 shows I watch pretty regularly as well as stuff on BBC America.

3. I feel like Miss Callie's kittens are my own babies sometimes, I love them that much, and I fear the separation anxiety I will get when they start going to their new homes.

4. Anytime I try to watch tv at 10 o'clock, I end up falling asleep about 10 minutes in.

5. My favorite shampoo is White Rain's Ocean Breeze. It smells so good.

6. I've been writing CD Reviews for a Livejournal community. Most are for Indie Artists that I've been introduced to care of a PR firm. I'm really enjoying it, plus I've received thanks from several of the artists I've reviewed. That's quite a good feeling.

I'm going to not tag people, because I'm a rebel like that, but if you decide to do this meme, come back and let me know so I can read your answers.

Tuesday Tunes: Week 57

From Music Memoirs

November 10th was the anniversary of the day The Edmund Fitzgerald went down during a storm on Lake Superior. So we're going to have a nautical theme meme

Word association style:

Ocean: Ocean Deep - Cliff Richard
River: River Of Endless Love - The Moody Blues
Sea: Looking Glass Sea - Erasure
Sailor: Saints and Sailors -Dashboard Confessional
Ship: The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald - Gordon Lightfoot (Obvious choic, right)
Wave: The Devlins - Waves
Sand: Fish On The Sand - George Harrison
Sail: Sailing On The Seven Seas - OMD
Navy: In The Navy - The Village People
Deep: Deeper Than A River - Olivia Newton John

Nommy Food

I had the shrimp scampi from Long John Silvers yesterday for dinner and oh was it good. I'm not a huge seafood fan, but I love shrimp. Scampi is not my thing most of the time, but I've acquired a taste for it recently and I've been dying to try the new menu at LJS.

I'm really glad I did.

The scampi is served on rice with tasty veggies in a nice herb butter sauce, if you get the meal you also get a small corn and a yummy bread stick.

Well worth the 8 bucks as I found it to be as good as anything I've had at fancy places. Its definitely worth trying.

Finally I've found something I like that isn't too terribly bad for me! That in itself is pretty downright amazing.

Maybe the next time I'll be brave and try the salmon.

My Book Of The Week

I belong to a version of The Book Of The Month Club that used to be called Zooba. I get one hard back of my choosing each month for about $10.50.

One of the books I got over the last few months is Monster Of Florence. Its a true crime novel about a serial killer that haunted the "Lovers Lane" type places in Florence, killing the couples that were getting some, so to speak.

Its not my usual type of book, but for some reason it appealed to me. Every so often a book like this does. I can watch murder mysteries on tv but I just don't like to read about them. Go figure.

Anyone read this one? I'm always curious to hear other people's takes on things I've read or am reading.

I'm So Pissed

Ghost Whisperer ruined my night last night. I can't believe they killed off Jim! I don't care if he stays on as a ghost! This just sucks!

I just started getting into the show this season and I really loved Jim Clancy.

How could they do something like that?

I've always hated when they screw with relationships on TV shows. It never happens for the better.

When I first saw the previews I had a clue of what was going to happen. Then I read some things on message boards for the show and I just got more upset. Lastly I watched the show last night.

Oye!

I don't even think it was done well.

They let us believe for a few minutes that he was ok, but then, BOOM! he's a freaking ghost!

I'm not sure if I'll be watching the show for much longer.

Top 5 On Friday - Week 198

From Music Memoirs

Top 5 "Country" or "Alt-Country" songs

Dolly Parton - Jolene
I've always loved Dolly and this is one of my favorites from her earlier material.

Johnny Cash - Ring Of Fire
I don't even have this one in my collection but its such a great song.

Brad Paisley - Waiting On A Woman
I just adore this song.

Lynn Anderson - I Never Promised You A Rose Garden
Fantastic song! I love it and Martina McBride's cover of it is superb too.

Lady Antebellum - Slow Down Sister
My favorite country band right now. This song is great live!

ARGH

Trying to deal with grandma's estate is really getting to me. She only had her bank account and her home. That's it. No life insurance or anything else. To pay for her funeral I had to use the money in her savings. Most of it had to be paid at the time, and now I have an issue with the inheritance tax.

~loud scream~

My stomach was just starting to feel good, but when faced with the daunting tax of about $1,100.00 that I don't have and part of that tax amount is wrong, makes me sick to my stomach.

Haven't I had enough stress in my life this year?

I was the one that found grandma. I still can't get rid of that visual six months later.

Of course I didn't see these letters until 4 o'clock yesterday so I could only leave messages for the attorney handling the estate.

So I'm back to being a nervous wreck and not sleeping well. I hope the attorney calls today.

My Final Words On The Election

Besides Yay! I want to say that I am so totally in awe of both candidates right now. Both McCain's concession speech and Obama's victory speech showed how good Americans they both are.

Perhaps if McCain could have kept his campaign half as dignified as his speech last night he would have had a fighting chance.

Both men made me feel proud to be an American.

I am however pleased as punch with the outcome. It was a hard choice for me to make too, as Hillary was my candidate of choice. That hard choice left the minute McCain picked Palin as his VP. That woman scared the hell out of me.

So many people felt this was a lessor of two evils contest. Maybe it was but it still made so many people in this country passionate about who got elected.

Its a shame that the only way for that to happen was to have 8 years of hell and a tanked economy. I'm hoping Obama gives his supporters reason to stay passionate over the next 4 years.

God Bless Obama and keep him safe and God bless America, a country I feel proud to call my own for the first time in 8 years.

4 Words For You Today

Get out and vote!

Seriously, this is probably the most important election in our lifetime. Don't sit at home and do nothing, get to your polling place and make your voice heard. That's the only way that we can truly hope for change.

I don't care what candidate you support. (OK, maybe I do) Just do it.

Why?

Because if you don't vote you have no right to bitch about who got elected. Sure one vote is small in the grand scheme of things, but what if everyone felt that way?

Your vote matters!

Just do it!

In this most historic election, make your voice heard.

Just like I'll make mine heard.

GO OBAMA!!

1 More Day

And all the political nonsense ads will be gone.

Praise the lord and anyone else! I can't wait. I am so sick of hearing both sides slam the other without saying a damn thing about what they are going to do to make America better.

Isn't that how it always is?

In the first months of any election, you hear a little bit about what their policies are going to be, but as it gets down to the wire, its all mudslinging and in the worst and nastiest ways possible.

I'm to the point where I really don't want to watch tv because I can't take the ads. They are making me crazy, especially that ad McCain has about weathering the storm. His negative campaigning has made me like him less and less and with his running mate being tweedle nit the wonder twit, well I shake my head in exasperation.

I just hope this election has a clear cut winner tomorrow night and we don't have to go through a 2000 election again. I don't think I could take that.

Mmm La Fiesta

We have an excellent Mexican place in our town. I know my stomach is going to kick my butt for eating there, but we had a coupon for Buy 1 Get 1 and it was only good for a week.

That's too good to pass up, so I took my dad.

Mmmm.

Yummy!

I had a chicken taco and a beef burrito.

Have I mentioned how good it is? Have I mentioned how much I love any brand of Mexican food?

It's been awhile since I've been out to eat and this was a welcome change too. Most of the time I just go to someplace quick, like Kings or Eat N' Park. This was good. A nice atmosphere and good food and the service was excellent.

Here's hoping they put more coupons in the paper, so I can go a bit more often.

The Catherine Tate Show!!

I've been hunting down Catherine's sketch comedy show anywhere I can find it. It seems like BBC America has finally decided to play the episodes, to coincide with the start of the new season of Doctor Who, which aired on Sci-Fi shortly after it was out in the UK.

I'm so excited! I love Catherine Tate and I loved her as Donna Noble on Doctor Who.

The show itself can be a bit obnoxious but its oddly amusing.

I'm so glad I'll be able to watch it on my own without having to hunt it down for my computer or my mp3 player. Its so much easier to be able to turn the tv on to watch something.

At least it should keep me amused while waiting for the last of the 5 Doctor Who episodes to air. Have I mentioned I'm saddened by David Tennant's departure? But I am excited to see who will be playing that part next. I only wish Catherine could still be part of that show. She was an awesome companion in the most recent series.

Ah well, at least this will be full of giggles. And I'm not even Bovvered by that.